“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” cliché, yet undoubtedly true. Countless times I hear the thought “I’m not pretty enough” go through my mind. For as far back as I can remember there has been a great value and importance placed on appearance. From the clothes you wear, to your hair texture and style to your complexion and of course physique. Always striving to keep up, conforming to society’s standard of beauty, seeking attention and acknowledgment for…..well, what for? I once had a friend say “this is the only me I get in this life, I might as well learn to like it.” I suppose it doesn’t really matter why we have fall into this trap, the real question is how do you get out? I pick myself apart consciously and unconsciously. Always working to make some aspect of my body and face “look better”. I can see myself as a little girl trying on make-up and being told I look really pretty, reading teen magazines and discovering that unless I look like the pretty girls I wouldn’t be popular, receiving admiration and attention when I appeared “skinny, thin or fit”, going in and out of various high school identities from hippie to preppy to sexy trying to find what felt like “me”, and now in my 30’s still coming up against the comparison game. I’ve grown accustomed to people acknowledging me with “hey beautiful or hi pretty girl”, and my ego feels quite satisfied for the moment until it begins seeking recognition again. What has happened here? Granted, I have been a stylist for fifteen years now. Prior to that I was applying make-up and creating hair styles for friends since grade school. I love what I do, yet I hate what I have let it do to me. There is a filter that has been magnetized to see, analyze, correct, criticize and change people’s appearances including my own. I can already see myself at 80 years old saying “why the hell did I waste so much time on that?!?!” I know I’m not alone. I go in and out of this drama and I hear about it from countless other women as well. In attempt to reverse this mental loop over the next month or so, every critical thought I have I am going to counter balance it with something that I love about myself. Retrain my mind to notice what I love rather than bashing what I hate. I hear that motto often, I have yet to put it to practice in this area. In all honesty, I am in love with who I am as a person. I’ve worked so hard on becoming the best me. I love my heart, my humor, how much I love, my care for others, my ability to create my dreams, my drive, courage and honesty. Now, it’s time to work on loving the outside. Not by trying to change it anymore, but by loving myself just the way I am. Imagine that. Loving how you look just the way you are without changing a thing! The only change that is being made is an exchange of self-acceptance for self-criticism. I invite you to join me on this commitment to greater self-awareness and self-acceptance. <3.
P.S. I used the Avatar tools to work through the feelings, judgements and criticisms I was having the other day and in 20 minutes time, they were gone :). I know not everyone has had this training so I encourage you to try replacing the unhelpful thoughts with helpful ones. And if you are ready for rapid transformation, the Avatar course is available to everyone :).
*The postings on this site are my own and do not represent Stars Edge Internationals positions, strategies or opinions.
Personal development coach, holistic healthcare advocate, beauty artisan, intuitive guide and writer. Trinity shares her knowledge and personal journey in hopes that changing even one life will lead to creating a better world today.
